Valentine's Day is mainly a movie structured around moments, a few of them genuinely funny or surprising but most of the Hallmark variety. Ashton K...
Valentine's Day is mainly a movie structured around moments, a few of them genuinely funny or surprising but most of the Hallmark variety.
Ashton Kutcher (Reed Bennett), a florist proposes to his girlfriend Morley (Jessica Alba). She accepts, and Reed begins his busiest day of the year on cloud nine. But as the flower-delivery orders start pouring in, problems accrue. Reed's best friend, Julia (Jennifer Garner) comes in to sigh over the dreaminess of her new love, Harrison (Patrick Dempsey). But Reed knows from a flower order that Harrison has just placed that Julia's boyfriend already has a wife and child. Should he tell her the truth and risk ruining her Valentine's Day? Then Jessica Alba shows up sans engagement ring and complaining of cold feet. A little boy (Bryce Robinson) rides his bike to the flower shop to order flowers for a mystery woman; that little boy's nanny (Emma Roberts) is a high-schooler planning to lose her virginity at lunch hour to her boyfriend (Carter Jenkins), and the boy's grandparents (Shirley MacLaine and Hector Elizondo) are a devoted couple about to face a revelation that will test their relationship. A separate set of subplots revolve around a football player (Eric Dane) rumored to be on the verge of retirement. He's pursued by a local TV sportscaster (Jamie Foxx), gets in a fender-bender with the florist's deliveryman (George Lopez), and is hovered over by his breezily self-confident manager (Queen Latifah) and his shrill, neurotic publicist (Jessica Biel). In what's probably the movie's least awful storyline, Anne Hathaway, as an aspiring actress who secretly moonlights as a phone-sex operator, tentatively plans to celebrate V-Day with her boyfriend of two weeks Topher Grace.
Too many plots like too many cooks, spoil the broth here. Almost every scene is larded by talk of flowers, gifts, cards, restaurants and other ways to spend gobs of money on a single day, all delivered by a raft of attractive stars or semi-stars rotated on and off by director Garry Marshall. A compendium of lovers found, lost and avenged on a day designed to make you feel bad if you don't have anyone, this would rate high on any list of pictures featuring the greatest number of talented actors given the least interesting things to do. view less