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1. Mumbai Delhi Mumbai has what Im convinced a Tushar Kapoor in a curly wig pretending to be a Mumbai Mulgi --Pia, in Delhi for the day. She has to meet (and very quickly reject) a boy her mum has short listed you see; Google HangOut , Skype and FaceTime being new fangled notions that Mumbai has yet to catch up on. Photographs or any kind of identification material so she knows who this guy is also dont seem to go down well with this family, though Pia sports a pretty snazzy DSLR which she uses to photograph things India doesnt care about "like heritage" she explains; and promptly goes on to snap pherangs in cycle rickshaws. She has on leaving Mumbai forgotten her wallet and on arrival in Delhi her mobile. She will run into a Goli Kohli (played by Shiv Pandit with a very bad Abhishek Bachchan in all his 'maila' roles hangover) and they will spend the day together. No, its no Before Sunrise or Before Sunset. Kaash is subah ki shaam jaldi hojaaye , We would have been so lucky. Kohli jabbers and cusses (as the film team believes most Delhi boys are wont to do), Pia pontificates on Mumbai name change (Bombay tou Bhai hai Bhai Mumbai sab ki aai hai) and there you were sniggering about Maratha nationalism and tries to gender sensitise Delhi men. Goli Kohli alternates between being smarmy and reasonably chastisised in turns.
I really have no idea what the film makers were all about in this film. Right from their use of I am pretty sure Apple Maps to negotiate the city--by no stretch of imagination would an auto driver who has cajoled Pia to hire him to take her to Vasant Kunj from the airport in under 200 rupees is going to take a 20 km loop around Teen Murti Marg to a half baked plot line that even the lead couple are not convinced about. Kohli will break traffic rules for. Also Kohli is so Delhi you know and Pia will steer him into making amends, Kohli will be lackadaisical about men feeling up women in Delhi's public places and it will be left to Pia to slap offenders in public and shriek to the larger Delhi male population AND THATS WHY WOMEN GET RAPED IN THIS CITY; and what is it with curly haired young women in Delhi and the "Are You A Virgin ?" gag. At least Preity Zinta and Dil Se didnt subject us to a "sanskar and culture" spiel.
Pia will get to the airport eventually but not fast enough for me.
I would say you tear up your boarding pass just now.